Before I grace the world with my infinite wisdom, I want to be clear about a couple things. Firstly, I welcome rational thought from others that will enhance the conversation of something that tends to lean more on cultural bias rather than science and human nature. We will be doing nobody any good if we feed into extreme thinking on something like pornography.
Secondly, even though it may not seem like it, I try to only use my blog for subjects that are important to me. I try not to use it to incite emotion or grandstand, or rub anything in anyone's face. I hope to never come across that way.
I want to talk about Jeffrey Holland because of some specifics about porn use, the adult industry and religion that largely go unaddressed. Let's get the easy stuff out of the way first. Pornography isn't full of rainbows and unicorns (unless you have a unicorn fetish, I suppose). The adult industry doesn't necessarily treat their "actors" like a Hollywood A-list celebrity. Often times, they risk disease, abuse and hostile work environments. Working with the government, one option responsible humans have is to regulate it, much like we do anything else (more on this later, as religion oftentimes ignores this reality beyond grandstanding against it with broad strokes).
The other "damage" porn has the potential to do (again, not necessarily), is replace a real relationship. Like anything else in this world, overconsumption will have negative effects. If I over-consume water, I run the risk of water intoxication or even hyponatremia. Yes, death by drinking water. Of course that is an extreme and rare example, but it stands as an example: humans can overdo almost anything. We have Darwin Award winners that prove this. Unlike water though, pornography overconsumption may go unnoticed. If an individual prefers porn over connecting to other humans close to them on a regular basis, those close to that person will notice.
Okay, got through the easy stuff. I recently became more educated on the Mormon Mental Health Association (MMHA)(www.mormonmentalhealthassoc.org ), which came out and said,
"We have done our research, let our members vote, and taken the following position over at the Mormon Mental Health Association. I am continually concerned at how many people consider themselves sex addicts when in reality what they are dealing with is an inability to adhere to fairly rigid religious standards for sexuality. There is a difference between unwanted sexual behavior due to religious beliefs and out-of-control sexual behavior. And both of those are still not "addiction."
"The MMHA has taken a long time to carefully review and put forth a position on the terms "sex and porn addiction." The MMHA is concerned that due to religious bias, the Mormon population is at higher risk to engage with treatment by practitioners/clinics/programs that is not evidence-based nor best-practice when it comes to dealing with unwanted or out-of-control sexual behavior. This position was put forth for a membership vote and was accepted by over 90% of the membership. The MMHA recognizes that there are many relationships where some sort of sexual betrayal can lead to immense pain and distress. This position is not about minimizing that pain. At the same time, the MMHA wants to be a resource to help LDS/Mormon members find adequate, accurate, helpful and best-practice approaches when dealing with these types of problems."
My personal experience can testify to this. I have put enough distance between myself and the "rigid religious standards" to know. This is where I wish I was the god of articulation. This is a control tactic used by religion. They identify a sin, then impose shame and guilt for those who partake, then offer holiness or cleanliness in exchange for your loyalty and contrition. If you find yourself in this vicious cycle, you are not in full control of your mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.
Let's use Jeffry Holland as an example. In his address on March 12, He offers an acronym for those "struggling." FAST stands for flee, ask, strive and triumph. In his remarks, you find exactly the type of rhetoric that you would expect: it is sin, stop sinning, ask God to help make you clean again, and keep relying on God against this sin your entire life (return customers), then trust in us (religious leaders) to give you your only hope. It is as plain as the nose on your face what tactics are being used. This is damaging, oppressive rhetoric that keeps the "faithful" docile and submissive.
The other thing about Holland's talk is the fact he really isn't concerned about possible damage porn is doing. His only concern is clearly conveying the need of the faithful to submit to their control. He doesn't address actual public health, such as possible negative effects on the actors of the adult industry. He doesn't show concern that we as a society may not be supportive enough of those actual humans that are possibly being exploited. He doesn't talk about love, and he only mentions mercy and grace once in general terms and only between the sinner and "the Almighty." He could have easily mentioned it without strong control rhetoric. He could have easily empathized but did not.
Because religious leaders utilize strong rhetoric like this, and because they place a heavy burden of guilt and shame on the "faithful," they hold a large responsibility for the "problem," or health crisis they are identifying. There very well may be a "health crisis" in Utah, but it is due in large part to religious rhetoric that forces regular sexual humans to try and do something completely unrrealistic. When they give it an honest try, most of them find themselves compulsively viewing porn until it permeates every facet of their life. It becomes unhealthy because it has now been incorporated into the guilt/shame, repentance cycle, to which there is no escaping. Leaders like Jeff Holland know they are culpable. They know full well the responsibility they should be taking in all this. Instead, they sit back and let their war machine run while they enjoy a return on their investment.
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